As I sit in front of my laptop and write this post, I’m nervous. I’m having butterflies in my tummy right now because I’m stepping outside my comfort zone and doing something very new. I have decided to be very vulnerable, open up and share something very personal to me and dear to my family.
One of the biggest reasons I started blogging was to share my life, stories, experiences and resources to empower other women like myself. I also wanted to create a community of women who can come together to connect and support each other. I don’t have all the answers, neither am I an expert, but I know that there is great power in connecting, communicating, collaborating and community. I always believe that everything happens for a reason and no matter how good or bad a situation may be, there’s always a lesson. We have to live with gratitude in our hearts and find a purpose behind it all if we’re willing to see beyond ourselves and see the big picture.
Today, I am choosing to share with you that I, like 5 million other women out there have been diagnosed with PCOS (Polycystc Ovarian Syndrome) which has led to my struggles with infertility. I was diagnosed as a teenager after episodes of heavy bleeding and after my periods got more irregular. But I didn’t realize how much it would affect me until I got married in August 2012. So as I sit here writing this post, it has been 5 years and 6 months since I married the love of my life and we started on this journey to have children.
I am sharing this today because I want other people going through something similar to know that they are not alone. Dealing with infertility can be hard and such an emotional roller coaster especially when people lack awareness or are insensitive with the way they act, talk or question you about your plans for children. Also as a Nigerian American woman, topics like this are considered taboo. So like a lot of other cultures, there’s still a stigma and shame placed on women like me, which can affect us mentally and emotionally and sometimes even destroy families.
So, if you’ve been diagnosed with PCOS, infertility or something else that seems so big and you think it’s the end of the world, I’m here to say I understand. I feel your pain, I know your struggles, I understand your grief but I also know that there is something more for you. There is life and happiness beyond that.
Look at me, I’m still here, happily married, with no children yet but building my businesses and working hard to live my best life. You may not be in the exact same place as I am, but I know you are not your diagnosis. Your value as a woman is not tied to your womb and you are beautiful, strong, intelligent and perfect just the way you are. Find a great support system and connect, open up and share because it’s liberating and powerful when you speak up. I am here for you.
I was going to wait till after I got pregnant to open up and share my story, but God wanted something different. He made me see that it’s easier to share a testimony after you’ve gone through the challenges and are in a better place. The hard part is sharing while still feeling down and going through it. Some people may think I’m crazy since I don’t know what will happen next, but I actually do. I have learned so much about myself and about God the last few years and one thing I do know is that I will have my own children and no matter where life takes me, God is still God. God doesn’t cease to exist just because you don’t get your way, what you want, when you want it. He is God despite all that, so trust and have faith in him. All things will work together for the good of so many so that his name will be glorified.
So SUBSCRIBE to my blog and join me on my journey to having my babies. Every week I’ll write a blog post or do a vlog to share more details and updates of what I’ve done so far, how I’ve been dealing with it, my process and resources I’ve found. Kindly leave any feedback or comments below. To get more information you can go to The National Polycystic Ovay Syndrome Association. I love and appreciate you all.